Matt Lauer’s Office Had “EJECT-O SEAT” and Trap Door that Led to Lion Pit

Reports of Matt Lauer having an “EJECT-O SEAT” have surfaced…

(New York City, NY) — Things have really unraveled for the former The Today Show host. NBC has received multiple reports that Matt Lauer had harassed multiple coworkers and interns over the years. Lauer was fired fromThe Today Show on November 30, 2017, but more details are being revealed about his past behavior and more specifically… his former office.

Upon Lauer’s dismissal from NBC’sThe Today Show, rumors started surfacing about Lauer’s much rigged executive office. Not only was there a button under his desk that locked the door to his office, but also a button labeled “EJECT-O SEAT” right next to it.

A behind the scenes look at Matt Lauer’s door lock and eject-o seat buttons…

The EJECT-O SEAT, which sits opposite of Lauer’s desk, was described as a seat that ejected whoever was sitting in it with the push of a button. It was activated by a high-powered spring underneath the chair that worked similar to that of a JACK-IN-THE-BOX which Lauer could activate by pressing a button underneath his desk.

In Lauer’s 2003 contract, he specifically demanded an office on the top floor with a large, retractable sky light. Executive’s thought it was strictly a pampered request, but after rumors of an EJECT-O SEAT began to surface, the reason for the request became apparent.

“It wasn’t just the EJECT-O SEAT, he even had a lion pit that he would drop people into right from the very chair they sat in across from his desk,” said a current NBC employee who wished to remain anonymous. “My name’s Steve Wilkins and I’m a PA, but please don’t mention my name,” continued the anonymous employee. “They’d simply say something that he’d disagree with and with the push of a button – they would be plummeting 70 ft into a lion pit that was in the NBC Studios basement.”

Lauer has denied rumors of a lion pit or the EJECT-O SEAT, but has admitted that he did have a false bookcase installed that activated by pulling a hardcover book of Tuesdays with Morrie.  The bookcase then leads to a cave similar to that of Bruce Wayne’s in The Batman movie franchise.

Reports of the lion pit were first documented when The Today Show co-star Al Roker accidentally triggered the drop floor. Roker who was substantially overweight at the time of the incident, accidentally activated the drop floor which led to him plummeting into a pit of lions. The fact that he was eating a hot dog did not fend well to ward off the beasts.

Roker makes the best of the situation in NBC Studio’s lion pit while waiting to be rescued…


Lauer continues to deny the allegations outside of the locking door mechanism, comparing the other allegations to “something a magician would construct.” Lauer said people are just fabricating and embellishing the facts and that he has no “sleight of hand” practices going on in or outside his office. Lauer ended his comment by throwing a “Ninja impact smoke bomb” onto the floor in front of him so his escape would go undetected. Unfortunately, we were outside and the wind was coming in strong from the west and we all saw him run to a cab clear as day.

Matt Lauer ineffectively uses a ninja smoke bomb to divert others from his escape into a NYC cab…


Full Time Fool

Full Time Fool has been with Moron Reviews since its inception in 2015.

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